today was a bad day healthwise

To quote my Dad I was ''in a very bad way earlier''.

It started up the field, I'd felt pretty rotten all day, and had slept for most of the day until getting ready to go up the field (I got some nice pictures of Harvey, but won't be posting them today). It was after I'd taken Harvey for a tiny walk that I was starting to feel really bad, as in having to do breathing exercises to try to maintain composure bad. Dad rushed us home, and hell, REALLY rushed us home. So I could go be sick, and well other things that are too much information, then I passed out on my bed.

Not long after, Paul turned up - as he does on Wednesday nights, and I was so out of it. The attack had taken everything out of me, and I just lay sleeping in his arms between accidently nudging him out of the bed (it's a single and I have a big bum!). After dinner I felt rotten again, went to the loo and felt a bit better then came back through to the bedroom and promptly fell asleep again. He left at about 8pm, leaving me sleeping and I got up at 10pm to have some tea.

I still feel really rough, so tired. All I want to do is sleep, sleep forever. I get the distinct feeling that I'm nearing another should be hospitalised point, I get this bad every few months, and every few months I tell myself I'll go in if it gets worse. I'm not sure how much longer I can keep kidding myself. It gets to the point where I genuinely begin to think, I could die followed by - well, at least it won't be painful. Knowing my luck, I'd die screaming in agony - so I really shouldn't think these things.

Anyways, I'd only came on to check eBay, as I'm bidding on webkinz which I can ill afford. I also want to buy books, despite having hundreds unread. Basically I want to comfort shop, which when you can't afford it - gets dangerous. However, I'm off to look at Amazon.co.uk and maybe I'll order something. Before I fall asleep, which is becoming very close, as even writing this, my eyes are shutting.